He wants to play basically all the time. I've set limits but he sneaks gaming in, gets angry when I shut it down, and doesn't want to do anything else. Tried playing with him to understand it better but now he just gets mad when I'm not as good. This isn't just about screen time anymore, it's affecting his attitude. Anybody else dealing with gaming addiction in their teens?
The anger when you cut it off is the real problem. That's not actually about the game, that's an addiction response. You might need to dial back the limits even more at first then slowly increase earned time. Getting him off the emotional roller coaster is the priority.
The anger when you shut it down is the real problem. That's addiction behavior honestly. I've been reading up on this stuff and kids' brains are still developing, so the dopamine hits from gaming hit different for them. Maybe talk to his mom about being on the same page? Co-parenting this stuff works so much better when you're unified.
The sneaking gaming is the worst part because it breaks the trust, you know? It's not just about screen time anymore, it's about him going behind your back. Have you tried talking about why he's so desperate to keep playing?
Have you looked into parental controls that actually lock the system after a certain amount of time? Takes the anger out of your hands if the game just stops working.
Have you thought about what he's getting from Fortnite that he's not getting elsewhere? Like is it the achievement, the social part with friends, just the escape? Understanding the why might help you find actual solutions instead of just pushing back on the behavior.
Man I feel this in my bones. My kid is the same way with Fortnite. He'll say he's done and then I find him sneaking in matches an hour later. The anger when you shut it down is real and it's exhausting.
This is tough man. Might sound crazy but have you tried playing a match or two with him? I got into my son's game and he actually respects the limits more now because I'm not just the fun killer. Plus I get why he's so into it.
My oldest does the exact same thing with Fortnite. We had to make a deal where he gets specific days/times he can play and he earns extra time through chores. It's not perfect but it reduced the fighting significantly. Also helped to let him choose which days instead of us forcing it.
Dude, this is exactly what I'm dealing with right now. My oldest got into Fortnite last year and it was like flipping a switch. The sneaking around part kills me though - I found him playing at 2am on a school night. Have you tried replacing it with something he actually wants to do? Like I set up a deal with mine where he gets gaming time after he completes other stuff first.
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This is such a tough one. We went through this with my oldest too. What finally helped was making him part of the solution instead of just enforcing limits. Let him set his own gaming goals with consequences he agreed to.