Caved and got my 14 and 11 year old iPhones. Now I'm paranoid about what they're doing on them. Installed some parental controls but idk if I'm doing this right. Should I be reading their messages? My wife says that's invasive but I worry about predators and stuff. First time doing this so any advice helps.
The parental controls are a good safety net, but I'd say the real move is checking in with them regularly about what they're actually using the phones for. My kids know I'm watching, and that's been the biggest deterrent without feeling too heavy-handed.
You're gonna second-guess yourself either way, but the fact that you care this much means you're doing fine. Just be consistent with whatever rules you set and be ready to adjust them as your kids prove they can handle more freedom.
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Dude, you're already ahead of the game just by thinking about it. I went through the same thing with my two and honestly, having honest conversations about what they're doing online helped way more than the controls alone. Start there and adjust as you go.