My 12 year old thinks 2 hours of gaming every day is reasonable. I'm trying to stick to 1 hour on weekdays but he argues constantly. My wife thinks I'm being too strict. Anyone else dealing with this? What limits do you actually enforce and how do you not feel like a total villain about it?
We negotiated screen time down to the homework and reading thing first. My kids know gaming happens after they finish other stuff, not instead of it. Helped reduce the arguing because the rule made sense to them.
One hour on weekdays sounds solid to me. We do a similar thing with our athletes because they've got homework and practice anyway. The key is sticking to it even when they push back, which they always do at 12.
The argument never really stops, does it? My daughter pulls the same thing with volleyball - "but all my friends get more time." I just set the boundary and stick to it. Natural consequences help though. He wants extra time? Fine, but that means less time tomorrow or a chore he doesn't want to do.
One hour is solid. I do 45 minutes on school nights and he can earn extra on weekends. The earning part actually makes him more willing to accept the limit because he has control over something. Just make sure whatever you decide, you actually enforce it. Kids test boundaries - it's what they do.
Two hours is what he wants. That's the key thing to remember. One hour is reasonable for a 12 year old and you're the parent. Don't negotiate away your boundaries just because he thinks it's unfair. That said, maybe agree that weekends are slightly more flexible so it doesn't feel like total lockdown.
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The argument never stops but I found that involving my kids in the decision helps. With my oldest I sat down and we actually looked at why I was setting the limit instead of just saying no. Still argues but less of a battle.