How strict should I be about screen time?

May 61 min read

My 9yo keeps asking for more time on his iPad and honestly I'm torn. Some parents at his school let their kids have basically unlimited access and I don't want mine to feel left out. But I also read all this stuff about how screens are bad for developing brains. Right now we're doing about 45 minutes on weekdays and he can usually get 2-3 hours on weekends. Feel like I'm just guessing here. What do most of you guys do? What actually works without making your kid feel punished?

7 comments229 views

Comments(7)

WWill R.RegularMay 6

I've got the same struggle with my two. The key thing I learned is that comparison trap doesn't help anyone. We set reasonable limits that work for our family and stick with it, even when other kids have different rules. Progress is slow but real, just like swim lessons.

RRobert M.New DadMay 6

Three kids here and I can tell you unlimited access just means unlimited arguing about screen time. Set a boundary that feels right to you and your kid, then enforce it consistently. Dad joke level advice but it works: just say no to the iPad sometimes.

CCarl L.RegularMay 6

We do screen time but we also protect our family time like Waffle Wednesday is non-negotiable. Maybe frame it less as strict rules and more as 'this is what our family values.' Your 9yo will respect that more than just saying no all the time.

CChris R.RegularMay 6

We do one hour on school days, more flexible on weekends. But honestly the bigger deal is what's on the iPad - some apps are trash and some are actually educational. What's he trying to play?

DDerek P.RegularMay 7

At 9 his brain is still developing and too much screen time actually does mess with sleep and attention span. Don't let other parents' choices pressure you. Set a limit and stick with it. He'll adapt.

RRexRegularMay 7

I'm pretty careful about screen time with mine but 9 is old enough to understand limits. I let my kids know the rule isn't arbitrary - it's about balance. Some kids at school probably get unlimited time and their parents don't see the behavioral stuff that comes with it later.

KKevinRegularMay 8

My rule is they have to earn screen time with other activities first. Reading, outside time, whatever. It works better than just saying no all the time. Kids respect boundaries that make sense.