After we had the talk about not talking to strangers online, he literally asked if "bad guys live in the internet." Now he's nervous about watching videos. I was trying to protect him but maybe I scared him too much? How do you balance teaching them to be safe without making them paranoid?
Honestly you didn't scare him too much - you had a necessary conversation. The key is follow-up conversations where you normalize the good parts. Don't just talk about danger, talk about what he CAN do safely. StampyLonghead videos with you watching = good. Random recommended videos = wait and check first. That's the middle ground.
You found the balance by having the talk though - that's the hard part. Maybe frame it as "the internet is a tool, not a person" instead of "bad guys live there"? My 6yo was similar after we talked about passwords. We showed him that HIS videos (like Daniel Tiger) come from people who made them specifically for kids, and that helped.
This is the hard balance. You're not wrong to scare him a little - that's healthy caution. But maybe follow up the "stranger danger" talk with some positive examples? Like "most people online are just making funny videos and being nice, AND we're smart about not sharing stuff." Fear + agency instead of just fear.
lol the "bad guys live in the internet" question is actually kind of reasonable for a 6yo though
I did the same thing and had to backtrack. Kid got nervous about everything. Found it helped to watch age-appropriate stuff TOGETHER for a bit and narrate it - "see, this creator is verified, it's safe" etc. Gave him back some control and understanding instead of just fear.
This is tough. I'd say ease back in with stuff YOU watch with him - like pick a family-friendly video and watch it together so he sees you're not worried. Kids pick up on our anxiety like crazy. The fact that he's asking questions means he's thinking critically which is good, just needs reassurance that supervised stuff is fine.
lol the "bad guys live in the internet" comment got me. Kids take everything so literally. My son asked if we could "lock the door to the internet" after a similar talk.
Man, this is tough. I think the key is framing it differently - instead of "bad guys live in the internet," maybe focus on "here's how to recognize safe vs unsafe situations." Like, you're not teaching him to fear ALL strangers, just to be smart about sharing info. My 6yo understands "we don't tell people our address" way better than "stranger danger."
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My therapist actually told me I was doing the same thing - leading with fear instead of leading with skills. Shifted to teaching my kid HOW to navigate stuff rather than just what to avoid. Changed everything.