RANT: Gaming turned my kid into a zombie

Dec 241 min read

Okay so I let my 11yo get into Fortnite with his friends. Fine, whatever, right? WRONG. This kid wakes up at 6am asking to play before school. He's basically non-verbal until he gets his gaming session. We've had actual meltdowns when it's time to stop.

I know it's a "normal" phase but watching your kid go from this happy, chatty kid to someone who grunts at you is weird and kind of sad? I'm not blaming the game, I'm blaming MYSELF for not setting boundaries from day one.

Anyone else feel like they opened Pandora's box with gaming?

11 comments432 views

Comments(11)

FFrank T.RegularDec 24

The 6am wake-up asking to play is peak Fortnite. But real question - is he actually struggling in school or just annoying? Because there's a difference between concerning behavior and normal kid gaming obsession. That said, the non-verbal-until-gaming thing would worry me too.

BBob M.RegularDec 26

Not trying to excuse it but 11yos are basically designed to be vulnerable to this stuff rn. Their brains are rewiring and they don't have the executive function to manage addictive games. Doesn't make you a bad parent for letting him try it, but yeah you might need to actually set hard boundaries before this gets worse.

NNoah B.New DadDec 24

The 6am wake-up asking to play is the red flag. That's not just interest, that's withdrawal behavior. Yeah this needs intervention.

KKarl J.RegularDec 26

The before-school obsession is the worst part. He's gonna bomb school if his brain's been fried by gaming right before academics. Gotta set hard limits.

LLuke N.RegularDec 24

"Non-verbal until gaming session" - that's when you know it went from hobby to compulsion. Did you set limits from the start or did it gradually escalate?

MMack G.New DadDec 24

Yeah Fortnite has a grip on kids that's different from other games. The social element + the constant updates + the FOMO mechanics are designed to be addictive. You're not crazy for noticing. Some people do limits like 'only weekends after homework' but honestly 11 is still learning impulse control so he might not be equipped to self-regulate yet.

FFritz N.RegularDec 25

This is the reason people say gaming is addictive and they're actually not wrong. The game is literally designed to maximize engagement by any psychological means necessary.

TTim K.RegularDec 25

This is rough because you can't just take it away now without a meltdown, but also letting it continue sounds unsustainable. Have you tried getting him to articulate WHY Fortnite matters so much? Sometimes it's the friends, sometimes it's the dopamine hits, sometimes he's anxious and gaming numbs it out. Understanding the 'why' helps.

JJake M.RegularDec 25

My kid is same age and same situation. I thought Fortnite with friends = good social outlet. Turns out it's also behavioral cocaine for 11yos apparently.

WWes B.RegularDec 25

what system are you on? Some games have parental controls that actually work. Also curious if his friends are all still playing - sometimes if you can get him into a different social group activity he stops caring about the game

DDustin P.New DadDec 26

Okay but "let my 11yo get into Fortnite" - how'd that happen exactly? Did he ask and you said yes or did peer pressure + your own parenting ease lead here?