Caught my son lying about homework and it was a wake up call for me

AlexRegular

Apr 301 min read

So my 8 year old told me he finished his homework when he hadn't. When I found out I got really mad and went off on him about honesty. But then it hit me - I had lied to my wife that morning about going to the gym when I really just sat in the parking lot on my phone. How can I expect him to walk in truth if I'm not doing it myself? We had a real talk that night, I apologized to both of them and told him about my mistake. He actually seemed to respect that more than the lecture. Anyone else dealing with this gap between what you're telling your kids to do and what you're actually doing?

6 comments119 views

Comments(6)

SSteveRegularMay 1

Getting mad is fair but the follow up conversation is where the real parenting happens. Use it as a teaching moment about honesty and integrity. Trust takes time to rebuild but it's worth the effort.

BBrandonRegularApr 30

Eight is old enough to understand consequences but young enough that this can really shape his character going forward. How did you handle it after you cooled off?

JJosh M.RegularApr 30

That's a tough moment but also a good wake up call for both of you. My son tried something similar and I realized I needed to look at how I was approaching homework with him. Were you able to talk to him about why he lied?

RRonRegularApr 30

Been through this with my older two. The wake up call part is real though. Sometimes it's not just about the kid needing to learn a lesson, it's about us figuring out why they thought lying was the better option.

JJosh M.RegularMay 1

That's actually a moment to build on. Don't just let it pass. Use it to talk about trust and what happens when he messes up. Eight year olds can understand that if we explain it right.

CChris R.RegularMay 1

Man that's tough. The lying hurts more than the homework part, right? I've been there. What helped me was sitting down later when I wasn't mad and asking why he felt like he had to lie instead of just telling me it wasn't done.