Why does my 4-year-old refuse to use the bathroom before bed?

Nov 25·1 min read

Every single night it's the same battle. We do the whole bedtime routine, lights are out, I'm almost back downstairs, and then "DAD I NEED TO POOP." It's been like this for 6 months. We've tried:

Going before pajamas
Going after dinner
Going before stories
Just... accepting it

Nothing works. Other parents dealing with this or is my kid just built different? My wife says to just let him get up and go but I feel like we're enabling something here.

5 comments425 views

Comments(5)

IIan P.Regular1d ago

This is a classic stalling tactic honestly. They know you'll take them to the bathroom because what else are you gonna do. Unfortunately you kinda just have to ride it out.

TTyler K.Regular13h ago

Our 4yo does this exact thing. We've stopped treating it like a negotiation and just accept that bathroom trips happen post-bedtime. Annoying but he's not actually having medical issues, just being a little dude.

RRick J.New Dadjust now

The fact you've tried all those approaches already tells me this is behavioral not physical. He's figured out it extends his time with you before sleep. Which is kind of sweet but also exhausting lol

GGene K.Regular14h ago

Honestly? We just made peace with one bathroom trip after lights out. Made it boring (no talking, straight there straight back) and eventually he stopped asking as much because it wasn't an event anymore.

WWyatt C.Regularjust now

6 months is a long time for this. Have you actually talked to his pediatrician about it? Just to rule out anything physical before assuming it's a stall tactic?