How do you handle disrespect from your kids without losing it?

Apr 18·1 min read

My 13 year old mouthed off to me in front of his coach yesterday. I felt that heat rising in my chest and could have gone off on him right there. Instead I took a breath and handled it calmly that night at home. Explained why that behavior is unacceptable and what it means to show respect to your elders. He apologized and seemed to actually get it. I think that measured response taught him more than yelling ever could have.

6 comments223 views

Comments(6)

BBrian K.New DadApr 20

I'm nowhere near the teen years yet but stuff like this keeps me up at night thinking about the future. How do you even prep for that phase?

RRobertRegularApr 18

Tough spot, especially in front of the coach. I've learned that addressing it calmly later at home works better than going off. Kids at 13 are testing boundaries, not trying to ruin you.

DDave M.New DadApr 18

That heat you felt is totally normal, but taking a breath before responding is the move. I tell myself with three kids that reacting in the moment usually makes it worse. Step away for a minute if you can.

DDerekRegularApr 18

Thirteen is rough. They're testing boundaries and their mouth moves faster than their brain. The key is staying calm so you don't prove their attitude right. How did you handle it?

DDerekRegularApr 20

That in front of his coach part is extra humiliating I bet. You want to come down hard but that's not the right moment. Private conversation after is where it happens.

AAlexRegularApr 19

That heat rising is the danger zone. I've been there. What helped me was taking a step back in the moment even if it means walking away for a minute. You don't want to escalate in front of his coach.