I love my kids so much but some days I lay in bed at night and just spiral about whether I'm messing them up. Like am I working too much, not working too much, not patient enough, too strict, not strict enough. My brain just cycles through all of it. Anyone else deal with this constant second-guessing?
This hits different at night when you're exhausted and your brain won't shut off. Have you talked to your wife about these feelings? Sometimes just saying it out loud helps. And maybe talk to someone if it's affecting your sleep regularly.
This hits different when you're trying to balance everything. I get up at 6am for soccer and still wonder if I'm doing enough. Just know you're not alone in feeling this way.
That anxiety you're describing is something a lot of us deal with, especially when work and family are competing for your time. The fact that you care this much tells me your kids are gonna be alright.
I feel this in my bones man. The fact that you're worried about it means you're probably doing better than you think. Those late night spirals are rough but you're clearly putting in the work.
The spiral is real. But here's what helped me - I started writing down specific things I did well that day as a dad. Not to be cheesy about it, but it breaks the loop when you can point to actual evidence instead of just anxiety talking.
Dude I lay awake at 2am thinking the same thing. But then I remember my daughter actually seeks me out and wants to hang with me. That's not something messed up kids do. We're our own worst critics.
Man, I feel this in my bones. The 2am spiral where you're convinced you're messing everything up is real. But honestly, the fact that you care this much means you're already doing better than you think. You're not alone in feeling this way.
The fact that you're worried about messing them up means you probably aren't. The actual bad dads aren't lying awake thinking about how to be better. Keep showing up for them.
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I feel this so hard. Some nights I'm convinced I've messed up something fundamental. But then I remember my kids actually seem happy and loved, and that spiraling feeling usually means I'm just tired. The fact that you care this much means you're already doing better than you think.