Anxiety about being a good enough dad is eating me up

1w ago1 min read

I lie awake at night sometimes just spiraling about whether I'm doing enough for my kids. Did I yell too much today? Am I working too much? Will they have issues because of me? I know logically I'm doing fine, my wife says I'm a good dad, but my brain just won't shut up about all the ways I could be messing them up. This anxiety has been getting worse and I'm wondering if I need to talk to someone about it because it's starting to affect how I show up for my family. Anyone dealt with this?

6 comments126 views

Comments(6)

JJasonRegular5d ago

The yelling thing gets me too. I had a moment last week where I raised my voice over something stupid and couldn't stop replaying it. But then I realized my kids weren't traumatized or mad at me. They moved on in like five minutes. We're so hard on ourselves about being perfect when good enough actually IS good enough.

KKyleRegular5d ago

Man, I get this so much. The spiraling at night is real. I started journaling when those thoughts hit instead of just letting them loop in my head. Sometimes just writing down what I'm worried about helps me see that I'm actually doing way more right than wrong. Your kids are lucky to have a dad who cares this much.

SSean A.Regular1w ago

The school run twice a day gives me way too much time in my own head sometimes. Sounds like you need to cut yourself some slack. You're doing better than you think you are.

MMarcusNew Dad1w ago

All three of mine have seen me lose it at some point, and you know what? They still think I'm a good dad because they see me trying. Stop the perfectionism spiral and give yourself credit for showing up every single day.

CChristopherNew Dad1w ago

Man, I get those 3am spirals too. But here's the thing - you're asking these questions because you care, and that's what makes you a good dad. Your kids see you trying and that's what sticks with them.

MMichaelRegular6d ago

This is hitting me hard because I'm dealing with similar stuff right now. Have you talked to anyone about it? I finally started seeing someone and it's made a huge difference with how I parent. The anxiety was making everything feel ten times worse than it actually was.