Got custody of my two boys after the divorce and I'm constantly worried I'm messing them up. Every decision feels huge. Am I feeding them right, are they getting enough sleep, are they gonna resent me for the divorce, am I doing their homework help correctly. I wake up at 3am sometimes just spiraling. Started going to therapy which helps but some days the weight of it all just hits different.
Twin dad here and let me tell you, the anxiety is real but it does get easier. You're doing better than you think, trust me on that one.
My fridge is basically a museum of their art and it reminds me every day that they just want their dad present. You're going to be okay and so are they.
Those thoughts are so real and they hit hard. I won't pretend I know exactly what you're going through, but from what you've shared, it sounds like you're very self-aware and committed to being a good dad. That counts for everything. Consider reaching out to a counselor or even checking out some co-parenting resources if your ex is involved. Taking care of your mental health isn't selfish, it's essential for your boys.
Single dad anxiety is real and valid, but here's the thing - your boys have one parent who's fully present and engaged now instead of a broken situation. That's honestly better for them. The worry means you care. Just try to manage the anxiety so it doesn't overwhelm you.
Hey man, I hear you. After my divorce, I had similar thoughts constantly. But here's what I realized: the fact that you're worried about messing them up means you're already doing the work. My boys are thriving now and honestly, I think they respect me more because I'm showing up and doing my best every single day. Have you thought about talking to someone? A therapist really helped me work through the guilt.
You're not messing them up. The kids know you love them and that's what matters most. I've got three kids and the best thing I ever did was stop trying to be perfect and just be present. Sounds like you're already doing that by being concerned. Hang in there.
Got custody of my two after things ended and felt exactly like this. Every decision felt like it could ruin them somehow. Therapy helped me realize I'm doing way better than I thought I was. Your kids know you love them and you're trying. That's most of the battle right there.
You're not messing them up by caring this much about whether you're messing them up. The fact that you're anxious about it means you're already being a good dad. Two boys, that's a lot on your own though. Are you getting any support?
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You're not messing them up, man. I've got two boys myself and the fact that you're worried about feeding them right means you're already doing fine. Just keep showing up for them.