Does anyone else feel invisible as a parent? | DadHQ

Does anyone else feel invisible as a parent?

Dec 41 min read

This might sound weird but like... I do SO much for my family and nobody notices. I meal prep, I do laundry, I handle bedtime, I'm the one up with the kids on weekends while my wife sleeps in. But I don't get credit for any of it. My wife complains about being tired but she also gets thanked by her friends for being a great mom. I just feel like the invisible support system. Anyone else feel this way or am I just being selfish?

7 comments24 views

Comments(7)

PPete S.RegularDec 5

This doesn't sound weird at all. You're doing invisible labor and nobody acknowledges it. Meal prep alone is like 5+ hours a week but it's not 'impressive' so it gets overlooked

DDex J.New DadDec 7

The weekend wake-up thing especially. You're giving her sleep in time and handling chaos while she rests, but somehow you're not the one getting thanked

JJamal W.RegularDec 6

This hits different because you're not asking for praise, you're asking for acknowledgment that you exist and your work matters. That's not needy, that's human

DDom F.RegularDec 6

Consider asking for something concrete instead of just visibility - like one weeknight where you get to check out completely and she handles everything. Sometimes acknowledgment comes through action

GGreg W.RegularDec 6

Real talk: does your wife know the full scope of what you're handling? Sometimes partners don't realize all the small stuff adds up. Worth having a sit down conversation about what you're actually doing weekly

HHank L.RegularDec 5

The bedtime routine especially is exhausting and thankless. You're the one wrestling with teeth brushing and stories while she gets peace, then somehow you're expected to be grateful for that arrangement

RRuben A.New DadDec 7

My therapist pointed out that I was doing tons of stuff and not telling anyone. Started just... mentioning it casually. 'Okay I meal prepped for the week' or 'I handled the morning routine today.' It changed the dynamic a bit when my wife actually knew what I was doing