Honest question: does anyone actually enjoy this?

Dec 261 min read

Like, I love my kids but some days I genuinely don't understand how people do this and seem happy. The constant noise, the cleaning, the responsibility, the decision fatigue. Everyone's Instagram looks so zen and I'm over here thinking about screaming into a pillow. Is there something wrong with me that I don't feel this pure joy everyone talks about? Or is it just that people don't post about the hard parts?

11 comments155 views

Comments(11)

JJared C.RegularDec 26

Honest answer? I don't enjoy the day-to-day stuff constantly. I enjoy the OUTCOME of raising them right. Different thing entirely. The actual moment-to-moment? Some days it genuinely sucks.

WWade G.RegularDec 27

Three kids here. Some days absolutely suck. But I noticed it gets better around 4-5 when they're more independent. The 0-3 window is legitimately the hardest span, not gonna lie.

PPat H.New DadDec 27

100% normal and honest of you to say this. The Instagram thing is the killer - everyone's showing the highlight reel. Some days are genuinely just survival mode and that's ok. You're not broken, parenting is just objectively harder than it looks from the outside.

DDan W.RegularDec 28

I think a lot of people DO genuinely enjoy it but they've also got partners who take turns, or family nearby, or they only have like one kid, or they're just wired differently. The constant noise thing though - that part I think most parents struggle with even if they won't admit it.

DDave K.RegularDec 27

the decision fatigue part got me. by 3pm every day I've made like 500 tiny decisions and my brain is just mush. what do we eat, what time, who needs what, when does practice end, and nobody cares that YOU'RE tired. it's relentless.

PPete D.RegularDec 28

The decision fatigue is REAL. I didn't realize how much mental energy goes into just the logistics until I tried to explain to my wife why I'm exhausted after "just being home all day"

TTyler H.RegularDec 28

Some days I enjoy it, most days I'm just managing chaos. I realized once I stopped expecting every moment to feel Instagram-perfect it got easier. Not great, but easier. Your kids don't need you happy all the time, they just need you present.

JJoel F.RegularDec 27

yeah and when you DO find moments that hit different (like one of my kids genuinely laughing at something I said, or showing me something they made), people act like THAT'S the whole experience. it's not. most of it is just grinding through logistics.

TTim B.RegularDec 28

Yeah man, the Instagram stuff is the killer. Everyone posting their cute moments while leaving out the part where they cried in the car for 10 minutes. Some days I feel like I'm the only one drowning.

CCarl S.RegularDec 27

People DO enjoy it but not all the time and definitely not all the moments. That's the part nobody tells you. You can love your kids and still hate wiping butts at 6am.

AAndy S.RegularDec 28

the constant noise thing - my therapist said I should've been honest that I NEED quiet time to function, not treat it like I'm lazy for needing a break. Changed my perspective.