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Hot take: dad culture makes mental health worse

Nov 241 min read

Been thinking about this a lot lately. There's this weird expectation that dads are just supposed to "handle it" and not complain, not ask for help, just push through. Meanwhile we're probably as stressed as moms but with zero support systems. We don't have "dad groups" like moms have playgroups. We don't check in with each other. We just suffer in silence and call it being a man. It's honestly toxic as hell and I think it's why so many dads end up burned out or depressed. Anyway that's my rant. Thoughts?

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5 comments126 views

Comments(5)

BBen L.Regular1d ago

This hits hard. I've literally never told anyone I'm struggling because there's this unspoken rule that dads just absorb everything. Meanwhile my wife has her book club friends she vents to constantly.

MMarcus J.Regularjust now

Dad groups absolutely exist where I live but honestly the conversation is usually just about gear and logistics, not actual feelings stuff. Still helpful though.

FFred V.Regular6h ago

The "just handle it" thing is brutal. I had a breakdown last year because I literally never talk about my stress, just keep pushing. Started therapy and it changed everything but man, the guilt I felt initially for "complaining"

RRyan G.Regularjust now

Hot take on your hot take - some of this is also self-inflicted? Like we create the problem by not reaching out. Not saying the culture isn't real, but we gotta start somewhere.

FFrank T.Regularjust now

You're not wrong but also I think it's changing? My neighborhood has like 3 dad groups now that started in the last couple years. Might be worth checking if there's anything in your area.