My 10yo asked why daddy drinks beer every night

Dec 8·1 min read

That was... a wake-up call. I don't think I have a drinking problem but I definitely use it to decompress and honestly to avoid dealing with my depression. Glass of wine or two after bedtime has become the thing I look forward to most in the day which is sad now that I'm typing it out. Trying to be honest with myself about whether this is just a dad-needing-a-break thing or actual avoidance coping. Not sure what I'm asking for here except maybe... is anyone in a similar spot?

6 comments393 views

Comments(6)

IIan P.RegularDec 9

I went through this with my dad. He didn't think it was a problem, but when my older brother pointed it out he finally got help. Depression is the real issue here, not really the beer.

ZZack M.RegularDec 9

lol the username is 'mental-health' so at least you're already thinking about it? Real talk: have you looked into therapy or is that not accessible for you right now?

CCarl W.RegularDec 9

Your kid asking shows he cares about you. That's actually a gift even though it's uncomfortable. Might be worth using this as motivation to deal with the depression part - for him and for you.

WWill S.RegularDec 10

Using beer to decompress isn't inherently bad but using it to avoid dealing with depression definitely is. Have you thought about talking to someone instead of reaching for a glass?

BBen H.RegularDec 10

That's a heavy question from a 10yo. Respect that he asked directly instead of just worrying about it. What did you tell him?

BBob M.RegularDec 11

The fact that he NOTICED is the thing. Kids are aware of patterns way more than we think. You don't have to have a drinking problem for it to be something worth examining.