Postpartum anxiety hit different than I expected

Dec 71 min read

Our daughter is 6 weeks old and I've been having these awful intrusive thoughts where I imagine something bad happening to her. I know they're just thoughts but they feel so real and they won't stop. I mentioned it to my wife and she suggested I talk to someone. Problem is I'm embarrassed—isn't postpartum mostly a mom thing? And I'm worried if I say anything to my doctor he'll think I'm unstable or something. Anyone else dealt with this? What did you do?

11 comments189 views

Comments(11)

TTony G.RegularDec 7

the 'i know they're just thoughts but they feel so real' part - that's the anxiety talking. knowing logically they're just thoughts while feeling like they're real is the actual definition of intrusive thoughts. this is fixable with help. please reach out to someone

RRyan G.RegularDec 8

6 weeks is when this stuff peaks honestly. Hormones are all over the place and sleep deprivation makes intrusive thoughts 10x worse. Please talk to someone - your doctor, not just your partner. This is treatable and you don't have to white-knuckle through it.

CCarl D.RegularDec 8

Does your daughter's mom have this too? Curious if it's bilateral. Either way you need actual mental health support not just reassurance from reddit. Call your doctor tomorrow if you can.

RRon D.New DadDec 9

postpartum anxiety in dads is underdiagnosed as hell. everyone talks about mom's PPD/PPA but nobody mentions it hits the partner too. the intrusive thought thing especially - that's textbook anxiety. worth getting screened, maybe talk to your regular doc first

RRob K.RegularDec 8

at 6 weeks you're still in the thick of it sleep-wise and hormone-wise (even for dads, cortisol is elevated). intrusive thoughts are scary but they respond really well to treatment. don't white-knuckle through this alone - tell someone irl

SSteve Q.RegularDec 9

having these thoughts doesn't make you broken or a bad person or a bad dad. it actually means your brain is in protective overdrive. get evaluated for anxiety - seriously - because this is one of the most treatable mental health issues out there

RReggie K.New DadDec 10

i went through this hard at like 8 weeks postpartum. convinced myself i was a bad person for having the thoughts, which made them worse. turns out it's anxiety, very treatable, and once i got help they actually stopped being intrusive. you're not alone

RRaj P.RegularDec 10

what you're describing sounds like intrusive thoughts which is actually really common and not something to minimize. the fact that you KNOW they're just thoughts is actually a good sign - means you have awareness. that said, if they're constant and causing real distress, talk to your doc

PPat H.New DadDec 10

I had this bad. Like REALLY bad. Intrusive thoughts about SIDS, drops, everything. Felt like I was going crazy. Turns out it's legit anxiety not actual prophetic thoughts lol. Mine got better with therapy - specifically therapy that addresses intrusive thoughts, not just general talk therapy. Push for that specifically when you call your OB.

SSawyer N.RegularDec 10

This is postpartum anxiety and it's way more common than people talk about. The intrusive thoughts part is the key - you recognize they're not real and that means you're not at risk. But you should def talk to your doc about it. There are meds that help without affecting breastfeeding if that's relevant.

MMatt J.RegularDec 10

the fact that you KNOW they're just thoughts is actually huge. that's the difference between anxiety and delusion. doesn't make it suck less but it means you're ok. still get professional help though - you deserve to not feel like this.