Postpartum depression, but for dads—anyone else? | DadHQ

Postpartum depression, but for dads—anyone else?

Jan 51 min read

Our second kid was born 6 weeks ago and I feel horrible. I know that sounds dramatic but I'm not joking. I'm not bonding with the baby the way I did with our first. I feel trapped and resentful, which makes me feel guilty. I keep thinking "this was my choice, what is wrong with me?" My wife is postpartum too and needs support, so I can't dump this on her. It's not depression in the classic sense—more like I made a huge mistake. Has anyone dealt with this? Does it get better?

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Comments(6)

TTyler K.RegularJan 6

I went through this after our second was born. Felt like I was drowning. Didn't realize I was depressed until my wife pointed it out. Started therapy and it made all the difference. You don't have to white knuckle through this.

ZZack M.RegularJan 6

The second baby hit different for me too. With the first one everyone checks on you. Second kid and everyone assumes you know what you're doing. But you don't feel like you do. Hang in there and please get support.

MMax R.RegularJan 6

It doesn't sound dramatic at all man. Postpartum issues aren't just for moms. Hormones, sleep deprivation, stress of a second kid, all that hits dads too. Please talk to your doctor about how you're feeling.

JJames M.New DadJan 7

Depression manifests different in dads sometimes. For me it was feeling numb and disconnected instead of sad. Didn't even realize that was depression until I started talking about it. Reach out to someone.

CCharlie A.New DadJan 8

6 weeks in with a newborn and a kid older than that is genuinely hard. You're not being dramatic. The fact that you're recognizing something is off is important. Talk to someone about it.

NNathan K.New DadJan 8

My doctor actually asked me about my mental health at my postpartum checkup with the baby. I was shocked he even brought it up. Turns out it's pretty common and there's real help available.