My counselor keeps telling me I need to take time for myself but every time I try to do something just for me I feel guilty. Like I took 2 hours to go to the gym and shoot some pool with a buddy and I spent the whole time thinking about everything at home that needs doing. My kids don't need me to neglect myself but my brain won't let go of that guilt. How do you guys balance it?
Your counselor is right, man. Taking care of yourself isn't selfish, it's maintaining the engine that keeps everything running. You can't pour from an empty cup and your family needs you at your best.
Being a new dad and trying to squeeze in me-time is hard, I get it. But honestly taking those moments helps you not burn out. Your daughter needs her dad healthy and present more than she needs you available 24/7.
That guilt is tough but try reframing it - those 2 hours probably made you a better dad when you got back. I had to learn the hard way that rest is part of being a good parent, not against it.
Taking care of yourself IS taking care of your kids. They need a dad who's functioning well, not burnt out. Whatever that thing is you want to do, just do it.
Your counselor is spot on. I used to feel the same way until I realized that when I'm healthier and happier, everything else is better. The guilt goes away once you see the results.
Sign in to join the conversation.
It's not selfish, it's maintenance. You can't pour from an empty cup and your counselor is right. Even 30 minutes doing something you love makes a difference in how you show up for your family.