The anxiety about being a good dad never stops

Aug 81 min read

I love my kids but some days I wake up in a full panic about whether I'm screwing them up. Like did I yell too much yesterday? Am I not spending enough quality time? Are they eating healthy enough? Are they getting enough sleep? I spiral pretty bad if I let myself think about it too much. Talked to my doctor about it and he suggested therapy but I haven't made the call yet. Just wondering if anyone else deals with this constant feeling that you're not doing enough.

7 comments194 views

Comments(7)

GGarrett M.New DadAug 10

This hits different as a new dad. I'm literally three months in and already spiraling about whether my parenting choices are going to create some weird complex. Glad to know this is just part of the deal and not just me being paranoid.

JJake M.RegularAug 9

The anxiety never really stops but I promise it gets easier to manage. I was a wreck when my daughter was born. Eight months in and I still have those thoughts but they don't control me like they used to. You're probably doing better than you think.

RRick M.RegularAug 9

I wake up like that sometimes too. Usually I can trace it back to something dumb I'm worried about. Have you tried any routines that help calm that panic before you even get out of bed?

BBrian M.RegularAug 9

This is why I think more dads need to talk about their mental health. You're not alone in feeling this way and you're definitely not screwing them up just by having doubts. The dads who don't worry are the ones I'd actually be concerned about.

RRyan M.RegularAug 8

Three kids here and I can tell you that anxiety never actually goes away, but here's the thing - the fact that you're worried about it means you're probably doing better than you think. The dads who aren't anxious are the ones actually screwing it up.

VVincentRegularAug 9

That full panic in the morning is real. I've had plenty of those days where I convince myself I'm messing them up somehow. But waking up worried about being a good dad is probably a sign that you actually care about being one, you know?

FFelix R.RegularAug 9

Man, I feel this in my bones. Some mornings I'm convinced I'm messing them up with screen time or not enough outdoor time or whatever. Then my kid does something kind and I think maybe I'm not totally failing. The panic is real though.