The loneliness of being the strong one

1w ago·1 min read

Everyone sees me as the guy who has it together. I work out, my kids are doing well in school, marriage is solid. But I'm falling apart inside and can't tell anyone because I don't want to let them down. I've been dealing with depression for two years now and just putting on a mask for everyone. Went to my first therapy session last week and cried for the first time in forever. Why is it so hard to just be honest about struggling?

5 comments136 views

Comments(5)

VVincentRegular1w ago

The schools looking good, the marriage solid, working out regularly - sounds like you ARE doing great though. But yeah I get it, doing things right means you can't show the cracks. Have you thought about talking to someone, like a therapist? No shame in that.

NNick G.Regular1w ago

Hey man, that takes real courage to say out loud. The fact that you're acknowledging it means you're already taking the first step. Have you thought about talking to someone professional about what's going on underneath?

MMike P.New Dad1w ago

Being the strong one is exhausting and lonely, I get it. But you don't have to carry everything alone. Even the best of us need help sometimes, and that's not weakness.

JJamesRegular1w ago

Man, this hits home. I'm the same way with people at work and even in my ex's family. Everyone thinks I've got it all figured out but inside I'm just trying to keep the plates spinning. The pressure to always be the strong one is real and nobody ever asks how YOU'RE actually doing.

TTony M.Regular1w ago

You nailed it with 'the guy who has it together.' I realized last year that being the reliable one means people dump their problems on you but never check in. Started being honest about my bad days and turns out people respect that more than the fake confidence.