My son is 3 weeks old and I feel like a complete failure sometimes. He cries, I don't know why. Is it hunger? Gas? Dirty diaper? And the sleep thing... we're barely sleeping. My wife is exhausted and I want to help but every time I try to soothe him I feel like I'm doing it wrong. Does it get better? When do they actually sleep for more than 45 minutes at a time?
Welcome to the club nobody warns you about. Three weeks with my oldest I called my dad at 2 AM convinced something was wrong. The 'why is he crying' question gets answered eventually but yeah, those first few weeks are just survival mode.
Man, the sleep deprivation is real. With twins I thought I was losing my mind at three weeks. All I can tell you is it gets better and faster than you think. You're doing fine, the fact that you care this much means you're already ahead.
You're not a failure, you're three weeks in. Your brain is exhausted and your hormones are all over the place. That feeling will pass. Give it another week and you'll notice you're actually getting better at soothing him. You've got this.
Man, I remember this phase. The not knowing why they're crying is the worst part. Everyone kept telling me to trust my instincts but I didn't have any instincts yet! It gets easier. By week 8 or so you start to figure out their cries. Hang in there.
Three weeks in and feeling like a failure is totally normal. You're not doing anything wrong - newborns cry, that's literally their only tool. Sometimes it's hunger, sometimes gas, sometimes they just need to cry. You're learning to read him and that takes time. You're doing better than you think.
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Three weeks in, buddy. That's when I felt the same way with my first. The crying thing gets easier to read, I promise. We do the hunger-gas-diaper checklist too and honestly sometimes it's just baby crying for no reason. You're not failing, you're just three weeks in.