Bonding with my newborn is harder than I thought

3w ago·1 min read

I know this might sound bad but I don't feel that instant connection everyone talks about. My son is almost 6 weeks old and honestly sometimes I feel like I'm just going through the motions. Changing diapers, feeding, trying to soothe him when he cries. My wife seems so naturally bonded to him already and I'm wondering if something is wrong with me. Does the bonding happen over time or am I missing something?

6 comments167 views

Comments(6)

TTony M.Regular3w ago

That's totally normal. The bonding doesn't always happen right away and that's okay. I remember feeling guilty about it too but honestly once my son smiled for the first time things shifted. Give yourself some grace here.

RRyan P.New Dad3w ago

You're not alone, man. I felt the same way with my first. Everyone's like 'instant love' and I'm sitting there thinking 'I'm just tired and this kid won't stop crying.' It took a few weeks before things clicked. Hang in there.

DDerek L.New Dad3w ago

This is totally normal dude. Took me a couple weeks before I felt like my oldest was actually a person I could connect with instead of just a tiny responsibility. Hang in there.

PPete L.Regular3w ago

Same experience here when my son was that age. Once he started smiling and making eye contact it flipped a switch for me. Give it time, the connection comes.

TTom E.Regular3w ago

Don't beat yourself up about it. At 6 weeks you're still in survival mode honestly. The bond builds over time as you get more sleep and he starts showing personality.

KKevinRegular3w ago

Real talk - those first few months are survival mode, not bonding mode. You're sleep deprived and stressed. The connection builds over time as you figure out who your kid is. Don't measure yourself against Instagram dads.