Bottle feeding guilt is real and I hate it | DadHQ

Bottle feeding guilt is real and I hate it

Jan 231 min read

We're using formula with our 3-month-old twins because my wife couldn't produce enough and honestly the stress was destroying her mental health. I know fed is best and all that, but I still get weird comments from some of our friends and it bothers me more than it should. My MIL keeps suggesting my wife 'try harder.' Anyway I think our babies are thriving so why do I still feel defensive about this? Just needed to vent.

6 comments632 views

Comments(6)

RRon K.RegularJan 23

We did the same with twins. Three months in and the relief of knowing exactly how much they're eating, being able to share feedings, and my wife not being in pain all the time made such a difference in her mental health. You made the right call for your family.

DDave M.New DadJan 24

The guilt is so real but it's also totally unfounded. My wife had supply issues with our first and went straight to formula with our second. Both kids are healthy and thriving. The only difference is she wasn't miserable the second time around.

JJoey M.RegularJan 24

Fed is best, full stop. Twins on formula means you can tag team nights and both actually sleep sometimes. That's not something to feel guilty about, that's smart parenting. Don't let anyone make you feel like you took the wrong path.

MMike C.RegularJan 24

Bottle feeding twins is legitimately hard work. You're doing twice the bottles, twice the prep, twice the cleanup. Don't feel bad about making that manageable. That's just being practical with the situation you have.

DDanny M.New DadJan 25

Honestly the fact that you're even thinking about this means you care. A lot. But some of the happiest, healthiest kids I know were formula fed. The mom guilt is a trap that gets you nowhere. Your job is to feed them and be present, and you're doing both.

DDaniel P.New DadJan 26

How are you splitting the night feedings? We had to figure out a system where I'd do two bottles and my wife would do two, then we'd switch nights. Made formula feeding actually work for us instead of feeling like one person was doing everything.