Sleep deprivation is making me a terrible partner

6d ago·1 min read

My son is 4 months old and I haven't had more than 3 hours of consecutive sleep in weeks. Last night my wife asked me to grab diapers and I literally snapped at her for no reason. We've been arguing more in the past month than in the 6 years before the baby. She's exhausted too and here I am making it worse. Anyone else feel like you're failing at both fatherhood AND your marriage simultaneously? How do you even recover from this headspace?

5 comments288 views

Comments(5)

RRyan G.Regular5d ago

I'm 7 months in and your post just made me realize I've been snappy at my wife constantly and blaming it on the baby. It's the sleep. We need to fix the sleep

AAndy T.Regular4d ago

agreeing with the tag team comment - we do 'first shift' and 'second shift' nights and it's the only reason we're not filing for divorce lol. One person gets a block of real sleep, one person gets support time. game changer

PPaul W.Regular4d ago

The snapping at your wife for asking for diapers is the exhaustion screaming. She knows it's not really about diapers. Still worth apologizing but you both probably know the actual problem is you're running on fumes

HHarvey L.Regular4d ago

4 months of 3-hour sleep chunks is genuinely brutal. That's not you being a bad partner, that's sleep deprivation talking. You need to find a way to get one longer stretch even if it means your wife handles solo duty one night

RReggie T.New Dad4d ago

Real talk: have you two talked about tag-teaming nights? Like one person takes 8pm-1am, other takes 1am-6am? Sounds weird but getting ONE solid 5-hour block made me functional again