Our daughter is 4 days old and every time we put her down she screams. If we hold her she's fine but the second she hits the bassinet it's game over. I feel like a zombie and my wife is crying from exhaustion. We're doing everything right according to the books but nothing is working. Does this get better or are we just broken parents?
Okay so this is the classic fourth day thing where they just want to be held. You're in the thick of it right now but it does get better. Try contact naps and don't stress about the bassinet yet.
Man, the 4 day mark is brutal. We had the exact same issue with both our kids. You're doing better than you think you are, just keep taking shifts so one of you can grab some sleep.
Welcome to hell, friend. 36 hours is brutal but day 4 is actually pretty normal for this. The screaming at down time is the witching hour thing. It sucks but it does pass. Try white noise, swaddling if you haven't, and honestly just survive right now. You can't force a newborn to sleep the way you want to.
This is exactly where we were with our daughter. The holding thing is real because they need to be soothed and they can't regulate yet. The good news is it gets infinitely better after week 2. The bad news is week 1 is just survival mode. You got this though.
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Try contact naps and just accept them for now. I know everyone says let them learn but they're 4 days old. They literally need you. Take shifts with your wife and sleep when you can. And seriously, ask for help from family if you have it nearby.