Expecting our first in about 6 weeks and honestly I'm a little nervous I won't connect with the baby right away. Everyone talks about instant love but I'm not sure if that's realistic for me. Any dads experience this and when did it click for you?
Honestly I was terrified about the same thing before my first was born. The bond kind of just happens though, especially once he starts looking at you and responding to your voice. You'll be fine.
Dude, I was the same way before my girl came. Honestly the bond snuck up on me - it wasn't this instant explosion, it was more like it grew every single day. By week two I was already losing my mind over her, so don't stress too much about it.
Six weeks out and you're already thinking about this means you're gonna be a good dad. The bond comes through doing the work - changing diapers, late night feeds, all of it. Before you know it you won't be able to imagine life without that kid.
Don't put pressure on yourself to feel some instant connection. Some of the best bonds build gradually through the mundane stuff - diaper changes, 3am feedings, bath time. You'll get there.
The 'instant love' thing is real for some people but definitely not everyone, and that's totally normal. For me it was more about falling in love through the little moments - first time she grabbed my finger, first smile, all that stuff. You'll get there man.
For me it wasn't instant. First few weeks were survival mode. But somewhere around month 3 or 4 I realized I'd do anything for this kid. Give it time and don't stress if you don't feel it immediately.
Honestly? Mine clicked around week 3-4 when my daughter started tracking my face with her eyes. Suddenly she wasn't just a tiny potato, you know? But everyone's different. Some guys feel it immediately, some take weeks. Both are completely normal.
The nervousness is actually pretty healthy. Means you care. I was terrified I'd feel nothing and then I got handed this little person and it all just clicked. You're going to do fine.
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Everyone talks about instant love but my experience was more gradual. The real connection came when he started recognizing me and smiling. That's when I lost it emotionally in the best way.