Not doing the dad thing enough because work is crazy. Not doing the work thing enough because I'm thinking about whether my kid is happy. Meanwhile my inbox has 200 unread emails and I promised the kids we'd play catch. Something's gotta give but I can't figure out what. How do you guys actually balance this without feeling like you're mediocre at everything?
The guilt is the worst part but honestly most of us are in this exact boat. You show up for work and you show up for your kids. That's enough.
The guilt on both sides at the same time is the worst part. But here's the thing, you're showing up for your kid AND working hard. Most dads in your shoes are just trying to survive like you are.
Man, that split brain feeling is real. I've got four kids and I still feel it every single day. You're not failing though, you're just caring about both things deeply. That's not failure.
Been dealing with this for years across two homes. You just gotta accept that you can't give 100% to everything. Pick your battles and let some things slide.
This is the real struggle right here. Work wants 100%, the kids want 100%, and you're one person. I feel this in my bones most weeks.
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You're not failing at either, you're just living the balance. It's never perfect and that's okay. Some days work wins, some days dad wins. That's normal.