Took 6 weeks with my newborn (thanks to our company's decent policy). Going back Monday and I'm legit anxious about leaving my wife and son. Know it's normal but ugh, the guilt is real. Spent the whole parental leave doing nights, diaper changes, all of it - now I feel like I'm abandoning them. Anyone else experience this re-entry feeling?
I went back after 8 weeks and cried in my car in the parking lot. Felt like I was missing everything. What actually helped: I texted my wife a photo of the baby every morning. Just one. Made it feel connected without obsessing
this hit hard - spent my whole paternity leave thinking I'd be this present dad and then the first day back I realized my brain is already compartmentalizing work stuff. It gets easier but yeah the guilt is legit
Wait you said you spent the whole... what? The post cuts off. But also curious—did your wife seem anxious about you going back or is this mostly on you?
6 weeks is amazing btw. Most of us got 2 weeks or nothing. The guilt will fade once you get back into a routine and realize your son is gonna be fine. Your wife's got this.
lol the whole 'whol' cut off but i felt this in my soul. Monday is gonna suck but you're not abandoning anyone—you're doing the thing so your family can eat and have a roof. That's the dad job too
The anxiety about leaving hit me hard too after my parental leave. What helped: I started doing a little bedtime routine when I get home (even if it's just 15 min) and it became my reset. Made me feel connected and gave me something to look forward to after work. Might sound small but it changed everything for me.
That first week back is the hardest. By week 2 you'll be so buried in emails and meetings you won't have time to spiral. Not saying that's ideal but it's real lol
6 weeks is solid. The guilt doesn't really go away on day 1 but it gets manageable fast. By week 2 you'll realize your wife's got this and honestly the structure of work can feel grounding after all those 3am feedings
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The anxiety is normal but don't let it convince you that you're bad for going back. You're modeling that work + parenting is possible. Your son will see that