Career stalled since becoming a dad and I'm angry about it

3d ago·1 min read

My buddy who started at the company same time as me just got promoted. I didn't even get considered. Pretty sure it's because I turn down all the nights out and travel stuff because of family obligations. Guys without kids just have more flexibility and it's not fair. I want to provide for my family AND have a career but it feels like I gotta choose. How do you deal with watching others get ahead?

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Comments(6)

MMike R.Regular2d ago

Have you talked to your boss about what you need to get promoted? Sometimes it's not that you're not considered, it's that they don't know you want it or what would make it possible with your family situation.

MMichaelRegular2d ago

That anger is real and valid but try not to let it eat you up. Your buddy doesn't have kids yet right? Different paths man. You're building something that matters more than titles.

KKyleRegular3d ago

I felt this hard when my first was born. But real talk, you're measuring yourself against someone living a completely different life. The climb looks different when you've got kids. Doesn't mean you're losing.

BBob M.Regular3d ago

That's a tough spot and honestly a lot of us feel that tension between being present and being ambitious. Have you talked to your boss about what advancement could look like without the late nights?

TTom E.Regular3d ago

I hear you on this one. Career stuff is real but missing your kids' years is realer. Maybe there's a middle ground with your company, but if not, you're making the call that matters most.

CChris F.Regular3d ago

Three kids and three different sports schedules here, so I get the grind. Your anger makes sense, but you're not stuck - you're choosing what actually matters. That's not a stall, that's a priority.