Just got approved for 2 months paternity leave and I'm actually nervous

Dec 11 min read

lol this is weird to admit but I'm scared I'll be bad at full-time dad duty. I've been working 50+ hours for 4 years and suddenly I'm gonna be the primary caregiver? My wife keeps saying I'll be fine but we have a 6-month-old and a 4-year-old. What if I mess something up? What if I'm boring and they don't have fun? Also... will I be able to disconnect from work? My boss said "just check emails when the baby naps" which feels like a trap.

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Comments(11)

TTony L.Regular1d ago

I felt the exact same way before paternity leave. Turns out I wasn't boring at all - I just did stuff different than my wife, and the kids LIKED the different stuff. They climbed more, we went on walks, less structured activities. It wasn't worse, just different.

ZZack M.Regular18h ago

You're not gonna mess it up. Real talk though - the first week you'll probably feel lost, the second week you'll find your rhythm, and by week three you'll realize your wife was right. Also: the boring thing isn't real. Kids think their dads are intrinsically interesting just because you're dad.

TTony G.Regular13h ago

Real talk: the first week is going to feel chaotic and you'll probably question everything. By week 2 you'll have routines figured out. By week 3 you'll realize you're actually good at this. The 6mo and 4yo don't need you to be perfect, they just need you present.

FFred J.Regular4h ago

50+ hour work weeks means you're probably out of practice with like... basic kid stuff. Don't stress. Bottle feeding, diaper changes, nap time - these aren't mysteries, they just require attention. You'll be fine.

BBrad H.Regular3h ago

Being nervous is actually a good sign. You're gonna be fine. The 6-month-old mostly needs food/sleep/diaper changes which is very systematizable. The 4-year-old needs you to play and set boundaries. You can do this.

DDanny G.Regularjust now

Dude you're not gonna mess it up. The fact that you're nervous about it means you actually care. The parents who mess up are the ones who don't think about it at all.

MMatt S.Regular19h ago

The nervous energy you're feeling is actually normal and honestly kinda healthy. Just don't catastrophize it. You've got 2 months to figure it out. That's plenty of time and your wife will be there if you genuinely need backup.

AAaron W.Regularjust now

Honestly the fact that you're nervous means you care, which means you won't mess it up. Just remember: fed, clean, safe, and loved covers like 90% of what they need. You'll get the rest as you go.

WWill R.Regularjust now

This is so valid honestly. Two months is longer than a lot of paternity leave and the sudden shift is intense. But also - you've got this. You don't need to be interesting, you need to be present. Which you will be.

SSawyer N.Regularjust now

The nervousness is just imposter syndrome. You literally cannot be boring to a 6-month-old and a 4-year-old - they have extremely low standards for entertainment. One dude I know said his kid thought he was hilarious just for making funny voices. You'll be fine.

PPaul M.Regularjust now

What specifically are you worried about? Like diaper changes and feeding? Or more like... keeping them entertained and happy? Because those are two different problems.