Paternity leave tips - taking 10 weeks in Sept

Dec 251 min read

First time taking it (second kid). With my first I only took 2 weeks because I didn't understand how valuable it was.

Has anyone done an extended paternity leave (8+ weeks)? What did you actually DO with the time? I'm planning to be helpful with the newborn/toddler stuff obvi, but also wondering if there's smart way to structure it so it's actually restorative and not just 'working from home while watching kids.'

Also - any concerns about how it looks to my employer? I'm at a pretty progressive tech company so it should be fine but would appreciate hearing if anyone had pushback.

11 comments98 views

Comments(11)

CCarl D.RegularDec 25

The difference between 2 weeks and 8+ is night and day. You're not white-knuckling through panic anymore. You actually get to KNOW your newborn instead of just surviving

CChris T.RegularDec 25

Did 12 weeks with my second. Honestly the first month I was just helping my wife recover and managing the chaos. Second month was when I actually got to DO stuff with the newborn - tummy time, baby classes, just being present. Third month was when it got fun

TTyler H.RegularDec 26

10 weeks is solid. First 6 weeks are survival mode honestly, not much to do but handle bottles/diapers and give your partner space. After that the kid's way more interactive

SSteve L.RegularDec 27

10 weeks is wild, good for you. With my second I actually reorganized the garage and built a deck because I had too much nervous energy lol. But honestly the best days were just slow mornings with coffee and the baby

JJerome S.RegularDec 27

Real talk: weeks 1-3 are just survival. You're not going to 'do' much beyond keeping humans alive. Weeks 4-10 is where you actually get to enjoy the baby and be genuinely helpful instead of just existing

KKevin P.RegularDec 27

Genuinely used the time to get my house in order - reorganized the garage, set up the nursery properly, installed some shelves I'd been putting off. But also just sat with my daughter and didn't stress about work. That mental break was worth more than the projects

LLarry P.RegularDec 26

The "doing" part is less about activities and more about being available. Took my older kid to parks, actually cooked some meals, gave my wife stretches of alone time. Don't overthink it - the value is just being there

CChris F.RegularDec 27

Don't overschedule yourself trying to "be productive." First 2-3 weeks just exist with your kid. You'll have plenty of time to do projects later.

FFred J.RegularDec 27

I took 12 weeks and legit just soaked in having both kids around. Took my oldest to the park while baby napped, didn't stress about the house, watched a ton of shows at 2am during feeds. Zero regrets

BBob G.RegularDec 27

Real talk - weeks 6-9 are when you actually feel human again and can DO things. First month is survival mode. Use that time to meal prep, set up systems, not like renovate the kitchen

NNoah B.New DadDec 28

Took 8 weeks. Spent a lot of time just watching my newborn, taking my older kids places, meal prepping. Also took walks with the stroller constantly because it was the only way my wife could get quiet time. Being "on duty" vs "at work" even for mundane stuff changes your perspective