Remote work with a 3yo is impossible, change my mind

Jan 121 min read

I've been trying to make this work for 6 months and I'm losing it. My company let me go full remote after my second kid was born, which sounds amazing on paper. But my 3-year-old daughter doesn't understand why daddy is "right there" but can't play with her. She interrupts every single call, and my wife is at work too so I can't tag her in. Yesterday I had a client presentation and my son literally knocked over my coffee on the desk while screaming in the background. I feel like I'm failing at both jobs. Anyone else dealing with this? How do you actually focus?

6 comments129 views

Comments(6)

TTerry O.RegularJan 12

Tried setting up a designated play area while you work? Ours helped for like a week then lost its novelty. Kids that age have no concept of 'working hours' and honestly they shouldn't have to manage that.

CChristopherNew DadJan 12

I know it feels like admitting defeat but remote with toddlers only works if you've got childcare during work hours. That's just reality. Nothing wrong with that setup.

JJarodRegularJan 13

The productivity guilt combined with the parenting guilt is a double whammy. You're doing neither thing well because you're trying to do both at once. Nothing wrong with telling your company that doesn't work for you.

MMarcus T.New DadJan 13

I'm not going to change your mind because you're right, it's basically impossible. What I will say is some companies have daycare subsidies or flexible scheduling options. Might be worth asking about instead of full time remote.

LLucasNew DadJan 15

6 months in and you're still sane? I lasted 8 weeks before I told my boss I needed at least 3 days in office. A 3yo doesn't understand 'daddy's working' no matter how many times you explain it.

MMarcus T.RegularJan 15

Would part time preschool a few days a week be an option? Even 2-3 days helps you actually focus and your kid gets socialization. Doesn't have to be all or nothing.