Stress management for working dads - what actually works?

I'm drowning. 50hr weeks, two kids, wife works 40hrs. We're both exhausted. I'm doing the "stress relief" tips (meditation, exercise) but honestly those feel like band-aids on a bullet wound.

Maybe the real fix is structural - like reducing hours or changing jobs entirely. But that feels irresponsible.

What's actually helped you? Not the "take a bubble bath" stuff - real life changes.