Trying to be present during work from home but feeling pulled in two directions | DadHQ

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Trying to be present during work from home but feeling pulled in two directions

1w ago·1 min read

I've been working remote for 2 years now since the kids were born and I thought it would be the perfect setup. Reality is I'm either distracted during work calls because the kids need something, or I'm so stressed about hitting deadlines that I can't actually be present with them. My wife works outside the home so the expectation is I handle kid stuff during the day even though I'm technically working. Feeling like I'm failing at both jobs right now. Anyone else dealing with this?

3 comments177 views

Comments(3)

MMike C.Regular1w ago

Man, I feel this so hard. I've got three kids on different schedules and WFH is supposed to be the dream but it's honestly the hardest thing I've done. My boss doesn't get that when my 6 year old knocks on the door during a video call, I can't just pause parenting. Have you tried setting like hard boundaries on when you're "at work" vs "at home" even though you're in the same space?

DDanielRegular1w ago

I wrestled with this for the first year of remote work. The key thing I found was being honest with my team about my schedule. I told them I'm working 9 to 3 hardcore focus time, then I'm dad mode. Some days that means a 7pm call to finish things but at least my kids know when I'm actually available. The guilt of being "there but not there" killed me until I made it real instead of pretending I could do both at once.

DDerekRegular1w ago

Is your company flexible at all with your hours? I know not everyone has that option but when I went remote it saved me because I could shift things around. Also real talk, being pulled in two directions is probably how it's always gonna feel a little bit. You're not failing, you're just doing hard things.