Divorced and Actually Happier

May 31 min read

Left my marriage after 8 years last year. Was so scared of being a "divorced dad" and what people would think. But man, my kids are happier when I'm not miserable all the time. My relationship with them is actually stronger now because I'm present instead of angry. I miss the simplicity of marriage sometimes, miss having someone else to handle stuff, but I definitely don't miss pretending everything was fine when it wasn't. The guilt took a while to process but therapy helped. I'm in a better place mentally than I've been in years.

9 comments144 views

Comments(9)

RRob H.RegularMay 5

This is awesome to read man. I'm co-parenting between two homes and some days I wondered if I messed up my kids' lives. But honestly seeing posts like yours reminds me that being present and happy is what matters most. Did you find it harder or easier to be dad in two separate households?

RRonRegularMay 5

Really respect you sharing this. The divorced dad stigma is real and it's cool to see someone thriving through it. My parents split when I was young and my dad was always there for me - sounds like that's what your kids have with you. Keep killing it.

AAlexNew DadMay 3

This hits hard man. Kids absolutely pick up on the tension, and I've seen the difference in my three since we split things up. They're more relaxed when I'm not stressed, and that makes everything better. Respect for doing what's right for them.

HHector R.RegularMay 3

Same experience here in Charlotte. The fear of being a 'divorced dad' was way bigger than the reality. My kids are thriving because I'm happier and more present. You're doing the right thing.

MMichael P.RegularMay 3

Really encouraging to hear this. My wife and I are still figuring things out, but posts like yours help me remember it's about what's best for the kids, not what other people think. Thanks for sharing.

PPedroRegularMay 4

This is the kind of story that needs to be heard more often. People put so much pressure on the 'perfect family' thing but being a happy dad is way better than being a miserable one. Props for making the hard choice and coming out the other side better for your kids.

CChris R.RegularMay 5

The 'divorced dad' stigma is so outdated. Sounds like you're doing the work to be better, and your kids benefit from that more than anything else. Keep going.

DDanielRegularMay 4

Happy to hear you're in a better place. That took guts to share. How are your kids handling the transition?

PPedroRegularMay 5

This is inspiring to read. I was terrified of the same thing after my split. Turns out being a present, happy dad is way better for the kids than being a stressed-out married one. They can feel when you're actually okay.