Got Clean and Actually Know My Sons Now

Been sober 18 months. Won't get into all of it but I was a mess for years. Missed school plays, soccer games, had angry outbursts. The worst part was the shame. Now my oldest actually looks me in the eye instead of being scared. We're rebuilding everything. Don't miss the drinking at all. Miss the fantasy version of myself I thought I was but that guy was a lie. This version is real and it's so much better.