Got divorced and realized I was the problem

6d ago1 min read

This is the hard one to admit. When my ex and I split three years ago I blamed her for everything. Therapy made me see I was checked out emotionally, critical all the time, never took initiative at home. It was brutal to swallow. The crazy part is now we actually get along better because I'm not that guy anymore. I'm more present with my kids, I listen instead of just wait to talk. Miss being married for sure, but I don't miss being that version of myself. Hopefully got some good years left to be different.

8 comments151 views

Comments(8)

KKyleNew Dad4d ago

This takes real guts to put out there. A lot of guys never get to this point. The fact that you can admit it and work on being different for your kids now, that's what matters. How are things with your ex these days?

MMarkRegular6d ago

Same journey here man. It's brutal when you realize the divorce was 50% on you. Hardest part was apologizing to my kids for what they saw during all that. But it's changed how I show up as a dad now.

BBrandonRegular6d ago

This hits hard in a good way. Being checked out emotionally is something a lot of us don't want to admit about ourselves. Props for doing the work.

BBenny R.Regular6d ago

Takes a real man to look in the mirror like that and own it. Therapy was probably the best investment you could've made for yourself and your kids.

RRobertNew Dad6d ago

That's really tough to admit but also really important. Took me a while to figure out my stuff too before I could actually co-parent properly with my ex. Props for getting there.

BBrandonNew Dad4d ago

Working through that stuff changes everything about how you show up for your kids. Glad you figured it out.

SStevenRegular5d ago

Takes courage to admit something like that publicly. Most guys just double down on the blame. The kids notice when you actually own your stuff though. That's the real lesson.

MMarco R.New Dad5d ago

This takes guts to say. A lot of guys never get to that realization. How did you actually process it? Like what made you realize you were part of the problem?