I used to be the fun friend | DadHQ

I used to be the fun friend

Aug 121 min read

Before kids me was always down for last minute plans, weekend trips, staying out late. Now I'm the guy who bails on stuff or leaves early because my kid has soccer at 9am. My single friends think I disappeared and honestly they're not totally wrong. Being a parent completely rewrote who I am and I'm still figuring out if new me is better or just different. The old me had more free time but this new version has a kid who asks about my day and actually cares so I guess that counts for something.

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Comments(7)

VVincentRegular3w ago

That identity shift is real though. I used to be that guy too and honestly some days I miss it. But then I remember how exhausted I was running around all the time and I'm okay with being the reliable dad now.

JJakeNew DadAug 12

Yeah the fun friend thing is real. But honestly being the dad who shows up solid for his kids is a different kind of cool that younger me wouldn't have understood.

CCraigNew DadAug 12

I'm that guy now too with three kids and the shuffle never stops. But I'd rather bail early from something than miss my kids' stuff. The priorities just shift.

AAlex R.New DadAug 12

I get this. Co-parenting across two places means I'm even more careful about my time with the kids. Some friends get it, some don't, but that's on them.

CCarlosRegular3w ago

I feel this in my bones. Going from zero plan weekends to coordinating nap schedules and snack times is a trip. But real talk, my friends understand now. They either get it or they don't.

JJoeRegular3w ago

The guilt about this is something nobody talks about. You're not boring, you're just in a different season. The spontaneous version of you will probably come back later, just looks different when you have kids in tow.

GGreg H.New Dad3w ago

Don't be too hard on yourself. Responsible dad with a kid is a whole different energy than single guy with nothing but free time. You're not boring, you're just prioritizing different things now.