Lost my entire personality after becoming a dad. Help?

Dec 25·1 min read

I used to play in a band, went to concerts every month, travelled, read actual books. Now I'm just dad guy. All conversations are about sleep schedules and daycare costs. My buddies still hit me up but I'm always too tired or broke or have some kid obligation. I love my daughters but I feel like I've disappeared somehow. How do you guys balance staying yourself while being all in as a parent? Am I just being selfish?

6 comments89 views

Comments(6)

CChristopher T.New DadDec 26

Man this one stings because it's so true for a lot of us. The band thing especially hits different. Do you still play at all or did you have to sell the gear?

IIsaac T.RegularDec 27

You haven't lost it, it's just in storage. Some guys find their way back to hobbies when the kids get older. Might not be exactly the same but you can rebuild.

SSam Y.RegularDec 27

The book thing is real. I have like five unfinished books on my nightstand. Keep telling myself I'll get back to them but there's always something with the kids.

GGrant C.RegularDec 27

This is hitting home too hard right now. I used to read before bed and now I just scroll my phone for ten minutes before passing out.

KKevin M.RegularDec 27

Have you tried even 30 minutes a week for yourself? I know it sounds impossible but protecting even a little bit of that old life makes a difference.

CChris T.RegularDec 28

The concerts every month life is long gone for most of us now. It's rough to accept but maybe the next chapter looks different instead of worse.