Before I became a dad I was the guy who could talk your ear off about movies and music and tech stuff. Now when people ask me what's new I just talk about my kids' developmental milestones and which formula didn't give them gas. I don't even recognize myself sometimes. Had to consciously remind myself I'm still a person with my own interests. Is anyone else experiencing this weird identity shift?
I feel this in my soul. I used to have all these interests and now I'm just the guy who talks about sleep schedules and milestone charts.
This hits different at 34 because you remember who you were before and it's weird when you realize how much that's changed. But you're still that guy, you're just more now too.
At 34 you're not having an identity crisis, you're just in a season where your identity is wrapped up in fatherhood. It changes but it doesn't have to erase who you were.
Real talk though some of us never get back to talking about those things. It's like fatherhood became the whole personality. How are you trying to balance it?
The developmental milestones stuff is important but yeah I know what you mean about losing the ability to discuss anything else. Try carving out some time for your old interests, even if it's just 30 minutes a week.
Movies and music and tech are still there waiting for you when the kids get a little older. You didn't lose those parts of yourself, they're just taking a backseat right now.
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You could try finding dad friends who also care about movies and tech. Best of both worlds and you don't have to pick one identity.