Who I was vs who I am now

1d ago1 min read

Before kids I thought I was important because of my job and my paycheck. I had this whole identity wrapped up in being the ambitious guy at the office. First kid came along and suddenly the promotion didn't matter as much. Second kid and I realized I was missing everything. I'm doing less at work but way more with my life somehow. My boss thinks I'm less invested but honestly I'm just invested in different things now. I stress less about things that don't matter. I sleep better even though I sleep less. Weird how that works.

7 comments257 views

Comments(7)

RRobertNew Dadjust now

Heavy realization brother. Most of us spend years chasing the job security and title only to figure out the real security is in the relationship with your kids. You're ahead of the curve on that one.

VVincentNew Dadjust now

This right here. I had the whole corporate identity thing locked down and it felt important until it suddenly wasn't. My kids don't care how much I made, they care that I show up. Took me way too long to figure that out.

DDerek T.New Dadjust now

This realization hits different when you actually become a dad. My job title means nothing compared to the fact that my kids think I'm the coolest person alive. It's a weird shift but the best one I've made.

SSteve K.New Dad1d ago

The paycheck is easy to measure so we all think it means something. But measuring impact on your kids is harder and way more real. How long did it take you to feel okay about the shift?

JJason T.New Dad23h ago

Still defining myself by work stuff and this is a punch to the gut in the best way. My job will be gone in five years but my kids will remember if I was there. That's the only scorecard that matters.

SSteve K.New Dad12h ago

Getting real here, losing that identity was scary at first but gaining the identity of just being a good dad is so much more fulfilling. I spent years building up work stuff that didn't matter. Nobody's gonna remember my annual reviews but my kids will remember that I showed up for them.

KKevinNew Dad11h ago

The paycheck still matters but for completely different reasons now. It's not about me looking successful anymore, it's about making sure my kids have what they need. Total perspective flip.