Anyone else's kids come back from mom's house with new rules?

Dec 61 min read

This happened again. I pick up my 9yo on Sunday and apparently she's now not allowed to eat anything with food coloring bc his ex's new husband is "holistic" or whatever. So no Gatorade, no fruit snacks, basically nothing fun.

Now my son is asking me to follow the same rules at my house. I'm not against healthy eating but like... he's 9. A blue popsicle isn't going to kill him. And I didn't agree to this. It's frustrating when new partners come in and start changing the whole dynamic without any actual custody papers requiring it.

Anyone else dealing with this?

10 comments230 views

Comments(10)

RRandy S.RegularDec 6

We deal with the opposite - my ex's bf is super strict about screen time at her place, then our kids come back and think they can play Fortnite 24/7. The inconsistency is more annoying than either rule alone honestly

TTom R.RegularDec 8

The "holistic" thing is code for control issues 90% of the time. I'd let it go at his place but not stress it at yours. 9yo is old enough that she can handle different rules at different homes

SStan D.RegularDec 6

This is so annoying. The food coloring thing is wild though - like unless there's an actual allergy, that's just controlling behavior masquerading as wellness. Does your custody agreement let you override stuff like this or are you stuck dealing with it?

BBrian L.RegularDec 6

I'd be more annoyed about it if she was asking me to enforce rules she set. But if it's just 'this is what we do at mom's' then honestly she can parent however. The food coloring thing is pretty harmless

FFritz N.RegularDec 6

The holistic thing is so extra lol. I had an ex girlfriend try this on me once with my oldest. Just buy your kid a Gatorade if she wants it

NNate C.New DadDec 7

So you just let her drink Gatorade at your house right? My understanding is that's literally fine, you're not undermining anything by having different rules in different homes. Kids are smart enough to know mom's house and dad's house are different

KKenny W.RegularDec 7

Yeah this gets old fast. My ex tried banning screen time on my weekends because 'it's unhealthy.' I had to actually set a boundary and be like no, those are my parenting choices

DDave K.RegularDec 6

wait so she's telling your kid she CAN'T have Gatorade at your house or just that she can't bring it from his house?

BByron S.RegularDec 8

Real talk: is he the type who's gonna escalate this to more and more rules? Bc that's when it becomes a problem worth pushing back on. One weird diet restriction is annoying, but if it's snowballing into other stuff you might need to have a conversation

RReggie K.New DadDec 8

This is so frustrating. The food coloring thing is whatever but the fact that he's imposing rules from his house during YOUR custody time is the real issue here