Communication with ex getting worse, kids are noticing

12h ago1 min read

Things between me and my ex have gotten pretty tense lately. We had a situation where I told her something was happening with our son and she basically ignored it and went a different direction without talking to me first. Now he's coming home confused about what's going on. I don't want to bad mouth her to the kids but I also can't just let these things slide. How do you guys handle it when the other parent isn't communicating or seems to be making decisions without you? We don't have anything legally binding yet on major decisions and I'm worried this is going to be a pattern.

8 comments113 views

Comments(8)

BBrandonNew Dadjust now

Yeah this is tough. When my two were younger and I was going through something similar, I realized I had to keep my frustrations completely separate from my interactions with their mom during pickup and dropoff. Kids are like little human lie detectors.

MMarco R.New Dadjust now

This one hits home hard. Your kids shouldn't be caught in the middle of your stuff with their mom. I'm not trying to sound preachy but have you considered talking to her without the kids around about setting some ground rules for how you communicate?

MMiguel R.Regularjust now

Kids pick up on tension so fast it's crazy. We had to have a real sit-down conversation with our ex about keeping stuff civil in front of them. It's awkward but necessary. Have you tried doing a co-parenting session with a mediator?

FFrank K.Regular12h ago

Man, I've been there with co-parenting tension and you're right to notice the kids picking up on it. The key thing I learned is keeping conversations about them focused on them, not on whatever happened between you two. It's tough but worth the effort for their sake.

VVic H.Regular11h ago

That's rough, especially when communication breaks down right when you need it most. Have you thought about using a co-parenting app or something more neutral to handle the logistics? Takes some of the emotional heat out of things.

MMiguel R.Regularjust now

Man, I'm sorry you're dealing with this. When communication with the ex starts going south it affects literally everything. Have you guys talked about maybe establishing some ground rules for conversations about the kids to keep things from escalating?

PPhillip M.New Dadjust now

The kids noticing is the hardest part honestly. I had to make some real changes in how I communicate with my ex because I could see it affecting my son. It's not about being friends but finding a way to at least be professional for their sake.

JJoseNew Dadjust now

This is rough and I've been there. Kids definitely pick up on tension between parents even if you think they're not paying attention. Is she open to trying co-parenting mediation or anything like that? Sometimes a neutral third party helps reset things.