Custody swap logistics - am I overthinking this?

Nov 251 min read

So my ex and I do the Wednesday evening / every other weekend thing, and I'm wondering if I should be making the pickups happen at a neutral location instead of her place. Right now I just go to the house (we live 15 mins apart in Portland), grab the kids, and go. My new girlfriend thinks it's weird that I'm going inside sometimes to wait. My ex seems fine with it - we're not hostile or anything, just... done. But is this a red flag situation? My custody agreement doesn't specify where handoffs happen. Feels silly to change it if nobody's uncomfortable but also don't want to make things messier.

5 comments149 views

Comments(5)

PPaul W.Regularjust now

Interesting that girlfriend's concern gets listed before what your EX thinks. What does she think about the pickups?

DDustin P.New Dad2h ago

Does your girlfriend understand that the kids live there? Like that's their home base every other week. It's not like you're hanging out, you're grabbing your kids from their room.

PPaul T.Regularjust now

Your girlfriend is being weird here imo. Neutral location pickups are more of a thing when there's high conflict. If you two are civil and 15 mins apart, the house works fine. Don't add logistics complexity for no reason.

LLarry K.Regularjust now

Yeah going to her house is normal and practical. Neutral location makes sense if there's tension or a new partner creates awkwardness, but that's... kind of a her problem to manage, not yours.

MMike F.Regularjust now

Only weird if your ex and girlfriend get weird about it. Otherwise you're just being efficient.