She's 12 and just told her mom she wants to stop coming every other week. Says my apartment is too small and I don't have her own room. It wrecked me hearing this. I have her on my weekends and we do stuff together but she's into her own thing now. Anyone been through this where a kid just doesn't want to be there? I don't know if I should push back or what.
Ouch. Before you panic too much, can you ask her what specifically makes it feel too small? Sometimes it's not about the apartment, sometimes it's about feeling like they have a real space that's theirs. Upgrade her room a bit maybe?
Man, that's tough and I'm sorry you're dealing with this. At 12 she's getting to that age where space and independence feel like a big deal, but that doesn't mean she doesn't want to be with you. Have you talked to her about what would actually make it feel more like her space? Even a small corner that's just hers might help.
This one hits different because it's not about you as a dad, it's about logistics. My apartment isn't huge either and honestly the train set situation doesn't leave much room, but my kids still love being here. Maybe focus on making quality time in whatever space you have rather than fixing the room problem overnight.
I hear you man, that's a rough conversation to have. But twelve year olds say stuff sometimes that sounds like rejection when really they're just frustrated about other things. Don't take it as the final word yet - keep the door open and see if you can work something out together.
That's tough man. The apartment thing is real for 12 year olds though, they're at an age where they care about their space and independence. Maybe ask her specifically what would make her more comfortable? Like can you help her set up her own area or let her decorate?
This is tough man. Has she given you specific reasons? Because 12 year olds can be pretty blunt about what they need. Might be worth sitting down and actually listening instead of defending the place.
This is hard but at 12 you might need to hear her out on what specifically bothers her. Is it the size? Lack of privacy? Noise? Could be fixable if you know what the actual issue is.
That's rough. Don't take it personally though, at that age kids get weird about stuff. Maybe work with your ex to figure out what specifically she doesn't like and see if you can address it.
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That's gotta hurt to hear. At 12 they start noticing everything about their space though. Is it the size of the place or something else? Sometimes kids that age just need to feel like they have their own actual room and privacy.