Third time this month she's kept the kids an extra day without asking. I had plans and had to cancel. When I texted about it she just said they were having fun and didn't want to disrupt them. How am I supposed to plan anything if I can't trust the schedule? Do I need to go back to court over this or am I overreacting? We don't have anything in writing which was stupid on my part.
This is tough because on one hand you want to be flexible for the kids, but on the other hand you can't just have your schedule constantly blown up. There's got to be some consistency.
Have you tried sending a text beforehand being super clear about pickup time and then following up immediately if plans change? Sometimes putting it in writing helps. But yeah if she's just ignoring the schedule that's not okay.
That's frustrating as hell, especially when you had plans. You need to document this stuff though. Third time is a pattern and if it ever comes down to a custody conversation, that matters. Keep records.
That's frustrating dude. Document every time she does it. Screenshot the texts if she's messaging you about keeping them. If this keeps happening, you might need to loop in the custody mediator or your lawyer. Third time in a month is a pattern.
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I feel you man. Been there with my ex doing similar stuff. The hard part is staying calm when she does it because your kids pick up on the tension. I started setting really firm boundaries and stopped being flexible about pickup times. It helped.
This is exhausting. Have you tried talking to her directly about it or does that just escalate things? Sometimes putting it in writing helps too, like a text saying 'I need to stick to Tuesday pickups because I have commitments.'