Ex won't stick to custody schedule anymore

2w ago1 min read

So my ex has been texting me last minute saying she needs to switch weekends pretty much every other week now. At first I was trying to be flexible but its getting ridiculous. Last month she switched 6 times. I have plans with my kids, I set aside the time, and then I get a text on Friday saying 'actually can I take them this weekend instead'. I asked her why shes doing this and she just said her new boyfriend has a busy schedule. I dont want to be that guy but I also have a life and my kids need consistency. Do I need to go back to court or should I try talking to her first?

9 comments204 views

Comments(9)

RRyanRegular2w ago

You need to set a boundary here. Every other weekend flipping is chaos for your son and honestly for you too. I'd suggest putting it in writing that you can't accommodate last minute changes unless it's an emergency.

LLance K.Regular2w ago

That gets exhausting fast. I dealt with this for a while and finally had to send an email laying out the schedule and saying last minute changes need 48 hours notice or they don't happen. Put it in writing so there's no he said she said stuff.

JJamesRegular2w ago

Every other weekend sounds like she's testing boundaries honestly. Have you considered going through a custody mediator? Keeps things civil but makes it official so she can't just text you whenever.

CChuck M.Regular2w ago

I get wanting to help but you can't let it become the norm. Your life needs structure too, especially with the kids counting on you. Time to have the conversation.

MMichaelNew Dad2w ago

Yeah, being flexible is one thing but constantly switching is not fair to you or the kids. You gotta put your foot down and stick to the schedule.

PPete L.Regular2w ago

That's exhausting, man. Kids need consistency. Being nice doesn't mean you have to enable her to bail on the schedule every other week.

AAlexRegular2w ago

This is rough man. The constant switching would drive me nuts. You need to protect your time with your kids though. Stand firm on the schedule.

DDusty M.New Dad2w ago

Oof I feel this. My ex used to pull the same thing. The guilt trip is real when she says she 'needs' to switch but you've got to stick to the schedule for your kid's sake if nothing else.

LLucasRegular2w ago

This is rough. Document every time she asks to switch. Not to be a jerk but you'll need that paper trail if it comes down to legal stuff. Consistency matters for the kid too.