Been dealing with this for months now. We have a 50/50 agreement but she constantly moves my days around last minute without asking. Last week she texted at 9pm saying she needed to swap Thursday for Monday. I had already told my kids they were coming to me Thursday. Now I'm the bad guy when I said no. How do other guys handle this? Should I be more flexible or is it time to lawyer up?
That's infuriating. I've been there with schedule changes and it throws everything off, especially when you're trying to plan time with your kids. You might need to start documenting every change and sending her written confirmation of what you agreed to so you have records.
Three kids and a coparenting situation like this would drive anyone crazy. The text message thing is a problem because it's too casual and easy for her to ignore. Have you tried moving all schedule communication to a coparenting app where everything's official?
Man, this is exactly why we need clear boundaries. I'd sit down and have a serious conversation about how the last-minute changes are affecting your relationship with your kids, not just your schedule. Sometimes they don't realize how much it impacts you.
Months of this would drive me insane. Have you sent her a formal message about the schedule violations? Sometimes putting it in writing (text or email) makes people realize you're serious. If it keeps happening, your lawyer needs to know.
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This is frustrating as hell and I've been there. Document everything - texts, emails, when she moves your days. Then get it in writing with her or through your lawyer that she needs to stick to the schedule. Don't let it slide just to keep the peace. Your time with your kids is important.
I feel this in my bones. When my ex started doing this I had to stop being flexible because she took advantage of it. It sucks because you want to be the cool cooperative parent but not at the expense of your time with your kids. Stand firm on the agreement.