Ex won't stick to parenting plan for sports pickup

2w ago1 min read

So we agreed I get the kids Tuesday through Thursday and she gets weekends. Soccer practice is Wednesday evenings. I set it up on purpose so she wouldn't have to deal with it. Last month she picked them up early THREE times without asking because she had plans. I asked nicely the first two times. Third time I told her that's not how custody agreements work. Now she's saying I'm being rigid and the kids should come first. But like... I AM putting the kids first. If we ignore the schedule whenever it's convenient suddenly there's no plan at all. How do I address this without sounding like the bad guy?

9 comments192 views

Comments(9)

RRexRegular1w ago

This is annoying because it messes with the kids' routine too. They don't understand why one parent isn't following the plan. I'd have a calm conversation about it and keep things documented moving forward.

CColin M.New Dad1w ago

That's frustrating. If you had the agreement in writing, send her a reminder email keeping it casual but clear. Document the pickups you do and the ones she misses. Builds a record if you ever need it.

RRob H.Regular1w ago

Have you tried texting her a couple days before with the pickup time? Sometimes people just forget, sometimes they're testing boundaries. Either way, paper trail helps.

DDerek P.Regular1w ago

That's rough. Is it just the soccer pickup or is she flaking on other stuff too? Sometimes a calm conversation about why the schedule matters to you helps more than just getting mad.

KKevin M.Regular1w ago

Had this exact thing happen with my ex. She kept 'forgetting' pickup times. What finally worked was me just showing up anyway and taking the kid to practice myself, then sending her the bill for gas. Sounds petty but she got the message real quick.

DDerek S.Regular1w ago

This is frustrating. Wednesday is Wednesday and if soccer practice is that day then it's on her unless you both agreed to make it work somehow. Document everything in case it becomes a pattern.

PPedroRegular1w ago

Man, this is rough. Wednesday practice falls right in her time but you're the one who signed him up? I'd document everything and send it in writing to her. Screenshot the schedule, the agreement, all of it. Co-parenting works when both parents actually follow the plan.

PPedroRegular1w ago

The post got cut off but I'm guessing this isn't the first time? You might need to get a mediator involved if it keeps happening. I know it sucks but sometimes the courts need to see the pattern.

RRob H.Regular1w ago

Co-parenting is hard when the other person doesn't respect the agreement. Have you tried putting the practice schedule and the arrangement in writing with both of you confirming? Takes the emotion out of it.